{selfish}

I just got done posting on my family blog and could not help but do short recap over here because after all those sweet children of mine are what truly make my house full as well as my heart. You ready for all this glamour....

I had gained 68 lbs. in hopes of having healthy triplet boys. It is hard to tell because I do not look as large as I was but I am wearing an extra large t-shirt that belonged to husband and those fine polka dot bottoms...well soon after that picture the crotch had ripped due to all of my expanding body parts...I had almost survived four months strict bed rest and couldn't even fit into many of my maternity clothes anymore. My girls were only two and I was a week and a half away from having very large triplets.

Today I realized that the above picture encapsulated some of the very last clear memories I've had over the last few years. I still remember these last three years but what has followed has been a whirlwind of surviving and I never knew how quickly time could fly by. The reason I thought about the above picture today was because I am trying to make sense of why it was so much easier to make peace with what was about to transpire with having triplets but can not seem to make peace with the fact that my girls are done with preschool. I do not want them to get bigger and I do not want them to go to kindergarten. Anyway I saved most of the emotions for the other blog but I am here to say that I think I might be selfish. I want to keep these kids little forever. My girl helped us to learn a lesson after her Dad expressed to her that he wanted her to quit growing and to stay little. Her response to him was "Dad, but if I don't grow bigger then I won't be able to get married and have children and I want to be able to love my children the way you love me." Darn it, why did she have to say that...at that moment that was not what I wanted to hear but needed to hear (there is a difference you know). It's all part of the Plan I suppose.

Anyway enough of all of that. I feel better now that I have posted about it twice...in fact I feel so much better that I may even start another blog just so I can write about it again (that's funny because I am not so good @ keeping up 2 blogs) Now onto the fun stuff....my kids in action at preschool. In case you are wondering I did not put the orange polka dot scarf on my child but I do like it...